The Birth of Declan

I attended Danielle’s beautiful free birth on November 13th, 2021. Her birth was my second in Oregon, and I am just so honored to have been welcomed into such a sacred experience. The following is Danielle’s birth story, written by her. **Graphic images ahead, including crowing images with blood

Describe your birth experience in 3 words: intuitive, empowering, and transformative

When was your birth? November 13 2021 How did you prepare for birth?

I've studied birth for years; birth and postpartum doula trainings, spinning babies, hypnobirthing, scientific texts, and endless books and birth stories.

How did you know that labor was beginning? Where were you and what were you doing?

Light contractions and mucus plug loss had been happening for two days, since the due date. 40+2. The days of, I used evening primrose oil as a lubricant to speed things along. At 7pm my water broke while sitting on the couch. So much fluid I soaked two adult diapers and pairs of sweatpants and decided to get into the tub.

What was your early labor like? What did you do in between contractions?

My labor went from water breaking to full blown contractions less then 4 minutes apart within 30 minutes. I sat in the bathtub and poured water over my body while the doula and my husband filled the birth pool. I only times a few contractions before knowing "this was the real deal". I spoke with the birth photographer, knowing it was time.

Did you reach out to family and friends to let them know your labor had begun?

I told no one I was in labor except my birth doula and photographer. My family didn't know of my plans for a free birth, and I don't want to worry them or listen to outside opinions.

When did your birth team joined you and when?

My doula is also known as a birth keeper. She had knowledge of homeopathy, herbs, and tinctures I wanted to use in labor. She came to stay with us a week before my due date as she is a "traveling doula" with traditional midwifery training.

What was your birthing space like?

I set up a blow up pool in the nursery. There were dangling twinkle lights and birth affirmations taped to the walls. It was pretty dark. I also labored in my living room on the couch, and in the bathroom in the tub and on the toilet.

Who supported you throughout the birth?

I only chose to have three people at my birth. My husband to catch the baby, my photographer who was also a doula, and my main doula, who identifies as a birth keeper, in a more traditional, unregulated sense.

What positions did you labor in? Did you favor any particular positions?

My entire labor I moved. I would shift and rotate between contractions and then freeze and breathe and lightly moan when one started. I was on hands and knees or leaning over the edge of the birth pool. I spent time in the couch.

If you chose cervical checks, when and how dilated were you? Did you have any emotions about your progress? (Excitement, defeat, frustration, surprise, etc.)

I only checked myself twice. The first time was after I got out of the birth pool and went to the bathroom. I saw blood and was worried. My photographer suggested I check to better decide if I wanted to stay home or transfer to the hospital. To my amazement I was fully dilated and babies head was very close. I check again at the end of pushing because I felt like I want making progress and his head was less then a knuckle length in. It was a very amazing feeling.

Did you use any visualizations or mantras during your labor? What were they?

I had practiced hypnobirthing and printed affirmations but that all went out the window when I was in labor. I was in a primal state and just let me body do what it wanted. If I tried to control breathing during pushing, it never worked.

What did your support persons say to you to that was most encouraging?

They mainly let me labor in peace, how I wanted. The would get me labor aid juice and provide a Doppler when checking heart rate. They validated my feelings when I said it was hard and hurt. They encouraged me that he would be here soon.

When did you start pushing? Did you feel the urge to push or did your providers help tell you when to start?

Right when I checked my cervix the first time pushing had lightly started on its own. I just went with the flow, allowing my body to push rather then fight it..I changed positions often. After becoming fatigued and frustrated with the length of time it took I did begin to put more effort by adding extra push on top of what my body was already doing. Decent to crown took 3 hours, we later learned this was because he had a nuchal hand, up by his face.

What was it like to meet your baby for the first time?

When he first came out, I was almost in autopilot. I set him on my lap, rubbing his back and assessing his breathing. Once I knew he was okay I just rested my head on his and breathed. I was surprised how much vernix he had. I said "Hello Cheese Ball."

What was your partner's reaction to your baby being born?

Ben was so excited. He cheered and did a fist bump! The photographer caught the best picture of it. He looked at the baby in awe and was so impressed with how strong I was. He said it changed his view of women and increased his respect for his mother.

How did you feel after your baby was born?

I was so tired, and the pain slowly set in. I was so glad to be at home, undisturbed. I took arnica and cramp bark and soaked in the new baby smell. It wasn't until day 3 that I actually cried and processed the fact that he was really here, and he was mine.

What was it like to deliver your placenta? Did you do anything with it?

After the birth we laid in bed and just relaxed. Snuggling baby and looking at all his folds of fat and tiny fingers. He laid naked on me, with nothing but a towel. We causally tried breastfeeding with no pressure or timeline. My back was sore, it felt like it was hot and on fire. The after birth cramps were shockingly hard. An hour and a half late the placenta came out right in bed. I had waterproof mats underneath. We put it in a tubberwear and eventually Ben cut the cord and I tied it with butchers twine. We saved the placenta to be encapsulated.

When did you name your baby? Why did you give your baby that name?

We named him Declan Benjamin Stell. Declan means 'full of goodness. Benjamin is his father's name.

What most helped you through the birth experience?

The birth photographer brought a little electric fan which I loved. I didn't want my tens unit, massage tools, or essential oils. I didn't use any of the herbs of homeopathy that I had on hand during birth.

What was the most challenging part of the birth?

Crowing was the most difficult part. He was born on the toilet, the dilation station. He had a nuchal hand up by his face, which really increased the amount of pain in that specific spot. He came out like Superman, and his arm and hand was a bit swollen from all the pressure. The nuchal hand was the reason pushing took so long, although the whole labor was only 6 hours.

Was there anything that surprised you on the day?

I was surprised that all my education and game plan went out the window. I was not in my logical brain, but the primal state. I remained calm and never regretted my choice to have a free birth at home. It was so peaceful with just my doula's and husband.